Crush.

I've always been a Mandy Moore fan. From the very first MTV of "Candy" down to her movies, until she turned brunette.. I've always loved her. [Even if my HS frieds mocks me for that! Haha!] I just remembered this because her song was stuck in my mind for a day now. [Or maybe.. Just maybe.. Am I crushing on someone? Hahaha! Nah!] Here it goes..


CRUSH
by Mandy Moore

You know everything that I'm afraid of
You do everything i wish i did
Everybody wants you, everybody loves you

I know I should tell you how I feel
I wish everyone would disappear
Every time time you call me, I'm too scared to be me
And I'm too shy to say

Ooh, I got a crush on you
I hope you feel the way that I do
I get a rush
When I'm with you
Ooh, I've got a crush on you
A crush on you

You know, I'm the one that you can talk to
And sometimes you tell me thing that I don't want to know
I just want to hold you
And you say exactly how you feel about her
And I wonder, could you ever think of me that way

Ooh, I got a crush on you
I hope you feel the way that i do
I get a rush
When I'm with you
Ooh, I've got a crush on you
A crush on you

Ooh, I wish I could tell somebody
But there's no one to talk to, nobody knows
I've got a crush on you
A crush on you, I got a crush

You say everything that no one says
But I feel everything that you're afraid to feel
I will always want you, I will always love you
I've got a crush...


**Someday, Im'ma make a cover for this song. [After I learn how to play the guitar. Sheeeeeesh.]

Guess Who's Back.. With A New Name..

Halluu blog world. It's been so long [As if there are constant readers of this blog.] since my last post, I think. Anyway, I'm back, and I changed my URL. Why? Because I can! And because I forgot my old URL. Haha! I don't know, the past two months we're kinda hectic and I didn't get the chance to really write it down.. And my new URL.. MELAIKINDABLOGS. As in Melai kinda blogs. Gets? I'm not a real blogger [If according to the definition of the social-cyberworld] but I am fond of writing my random blahs and constant rants and occasional 'E'-pisodes. Anyway..

UPDATES. UPDATES. UPDATES.

REPENT. RECEIVE. REDEEMED.
I just got back from Youth Camp. It was indeed a very fulfilling activity since a lot participated and a lot were blessed and touched by the Holy Spirit. [A whooping 106 campers and 29 counselors and staff] Words aren't enough to describe it. I was just amazed on how God [again] worked throughout the camp. ANG GALING! Ü Of course, I was also happy because He again used me to share His words to those young people. New faces, new found friends, better & deeper friendships, resolved issues, renewed life, clean heart, FUN, FUN and FUN. Truly one memorable camp. :)

SETTING THINGS STRAIGHT.
For the two weeks I've been contemplating on things and about the "future". I did a lot of thinking, arguing with myself, justifying things with my biased self, etc. BUT, as what people always say, right decisions are not always the happy ones. So even if it breaks my heart, I have to make those decisions [even if I'm half-hearted.] in order to set things straight and be right. These have burdened me for the past months, and now, by doing this, I can't really say that the burden is lifted out on me, but I know that everything will be right again, one by one. [I just hope that the people that I've hurt along the way would come to understand me in time. After all, this isn't just or me. It's for the benefit of all. I think?]

KEEPING IT TOGETHER.
So yeah. I am once again back to square one. But I know this time I'll manage to keep it together, I just have to keep myself super busy to avoid "idle moments". It'll be the whole coping up process again. Reliving the hurt and pain again. And going through it again for the Nth time. Gaaaaaaah! I don't know anymore what to think or how to feel. I guess I'll just let myself rest for now. And just watch how things will go from here. And hoping that all will go well..

DEADLINE: May

DEADLINE: May

It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.
It will be a brand new me come May.

Just imagine that I wrote that on a sheet of yellow pad, back-to-back.

Yes, it will be a brand new me come May. Just wait and see.

Somewhere In Between.

Hey hey hey! It's April already. Haven't blog for almost a month now because of the busy schedule last March. [Thank God that Broadway blahs are over!]

It's been one rock n' rollin' month if you ask me. I've been always on the go [No to idle moments, as what my friends would always say.] and always doing something. I'm slowly starting to feel the pressure since the Youth Camp is fast approaching and I'm not [spiritually] geared up yet. I still have issue within myself [And no, I'm not confused with my sexuality. Haha!] that I seriously need to resolve..fast! And now, instead of making a 'readable' post, I am ranting. [Forgive me. And hey! It's my blog anyway.]

April. Haaaaaaaay. You've been so special to me ever since... forever? I don't know. It's just that summer is my favorite time of the year [And not because of summer flings! Haha!] where you're entitled to bum around, hit the beach, enjoy the sand, be tan and be in at the same time, everything under the sun! Expect the sun to be always smiling at you everyday from now on until the summer season ends. Yes it will be very hot, but it's the kind of heat that you'll really enjoy! [If I'll have a chance, I'd join ABS-CBN's Summer Station ID just to express how I really love summer. Haha!] And having to write this paragraph about it puts a smile to my face.. Aaaaaahh.. SUMMER! Ü

But now.. I don't know. I think something's taking a hold of me enjoying my most awaited time of the year. So yeah, I am somewhere in between.

Malikot Na Utak Sa Madaling Araw.

-- Natatakot ako magtiwala ulit ng lubusan pero alam kong dito ako masaya kahit may pagdadalawang [pagtatatlong, at pagaapat] isip parin ako.

-- Ayoko nang maulit yung sakit na naramdaman ko nung mga nakalipas na buwan, as in ayoko na. Sana hindi na maulit pa. Sana.

-- Ang hirap pala kapag tiwala ang nasira, lahat damay.

-- Nawalan din ako ng tiwala sa sarili ko nung nawalan ako ng tiwala sa kanya.

-- Masakit parin kapag naiisip ko yung mga bagay-bagay. Nandiyan na yan, di na maaalis.

-- Masaya ako kahit may mga ganitong kaisipan ako. Sana magtagal ito. Sana.

-- Lulubusin ko na habang nandito pa, at kapag nawala, walang sisihan.

At bago ko tapusin 'to, bibirit muna ko.. ♫♪ And all I can do is hope and pray.. Cause heaven knows.. ♪♫ Sige na dito na lang muna. Random. Che! Okthanksbye.