Brighter Days. :)

last august 12 was the most sincere and honest conversation i've had with him. he cried, i cried, a lot. it wasn't an easy thing to do, knowing that the truth really hurts. but im thankful for all that's been said and done that day. it really opened my heart to finally just accept the fact and to let it go.

we've decided to start it all over, and just let time decide on how things will work out. it may or may not be in my favor, but who cares? at least we've tried to fix where we've started, and that is on being the best of friends. after all, i know (and i now believe) that God has a better plan that what i've already pictured in my mind. surrendering all the pain that i'm feeling to Him gave me hope. not the kind of hope that someday we'll be back together, but hope that tomorrow will be better than today. He has wiped my tears for me to see a bright tomorrow, used people (or even dogs) around me to give me happiness, used me (and my experience) to help out other people, and lastly gave me an opportunity to become more closer to my mom. (the best!)

this indeed gave me the lesson that i have to learn the hard (and painful by the way) way. but then, the important thing is, i've learned, and i'm changing (a work still in progress). all these wouldn't be possible without God's help, with the power hug of my mom, the distractions of my dad, the ignorance of my sisters (meaning they didn't know, not unitl now i guess), the understanding of my one true bestfriend, and the super wet kisses of draco (my sister's pet yorkie).

so for all those who's struggling right now, don't be afraid to cry. let it all out until it hurts no more. turn to God for help, and everything else will follow. there's hope for brigther days. :)

The One That Got Away. :(

I guess it’s that person with who everything was great, everything was perfect, but the timing was just wrong. There was no fault in the person, there was no flaw in the chemistry, but the cards just didn’t fall the right way, I suppose. I believe in the fact that ending up with someone, finding a long time partner that is, does not lie merely in the other person. I can actually argue that an equal part, or maybe even the greater part, has to do with the matter of timing.

It has to do with you being ready to settle down and commit to someone in a way that goes beyond the little necessities of giddy romance. How often have you gone through it without even realizing it? When you’re not ready to commit in that mature manner, it doesn’t matter who you’re with, it just doesn’t work. Small problems become big; inconsequential become deal breakers simply because you’re not ready and it shows. It’s not that you and the person you’re with are no good; it’s just that it’s not yet right, and little things become the flashpoint of that fact.

Then one day you’re ready. You really are. And when this happens you’ll be ready to settle down with someone. He or she may not be perfect, they might not be the brightest star of romance to ever have burned in your life, but it’ll work because you’re ready. It’ll work because it’s the right time and you’ll make it work. And it’ll make sense, it really will. The day comes when you’re finally making sense of things, and you find yourself to be a different person. Things are different, your approach is different, you finally understand who you are and what you want and you’ve become ready because the time has truly arrived. And mind you, there’s no telling when this day will come.

Hopefully you’re single… but you could be in a long-term relationship, you could be married with three kids, it doesn’t matter. All you know is that you’ve changed, and for some reason, the one that got away, is the first person you think about. You’ll think about them because you’ll wonder, "What if they were here today?" You’ll wonder, "What if we were together now, with me as I am and not as I was?"

That’s what the one that got away is. The biggest "What if?" you’ll have in your life.

If you’re married, you’ll just have to accept the fact that the one that got away, got away. Believe me, no matter how fairy tale you think your marriage is, this can happen to the best of us. But hopefully you’re mature enough to realize that if you’re already with the one you’re with, that this is just another test of your commitment, one which will just strengthen your marriage when you get past it. Sure, you’ll think about him/her every so often, but it’s alright. It’s never nice to live with a "might have been," but it happens.

Maybe the one that got away is the one who’s already married. In which case it’s the same thing. You just have to accept and know that your memories of that person will probably bring a nice little smile to your lips in the future when you’re old and gray and reminiscing.

But if neither of that is the case, then it’s different. What do you do if it’s not yet too late? Simple… find him, find her. Because the very existence of a "one that got away" means that you’ll always wonder, what if you got that one? Ask him out to coffee; ask her out to a movie, it doesn’t matter if you’ve dropped in from out of nowhere. You’d be surprised, you just might be "the one that got away" as well for the person who is your "the one that got away." You might drop in from out of nowhere and it won’t make a difference.

If the timing is finally right,it’ll all just fall into place somehow. And it would be a great feeling, if in the end, you’d be able to say to someone, "Hey you, you’re the one that almost got away."

Insensitive

How do you cool your lips, after a summer's kiss?
How do you rid the sweat, after the body bliss?
How do you turn your eyes, from the romantic glare?
How do you block the sound of a voice, you'd know anywhere?

Oh I really should have known,
By the time you drove me home,
By the vagueness in your eyes,
Your casual good-byes,
By the chill in your embrace,
The expression on your face, that told me,
Maybe you might have, some advise to give, on how to be, insensitive.

How do you numb your skin, after the warmest touch?
How do you slow your blood, after the body rush?
How do you free your soul, after you've found a friend?
How do you teach your heart it's a crime, to fall in love again?

Well you probably won't remember me,
It's probably ancient history,
I'm one of the chosen few,
Who went ahead and fell for you,
I'm out of bold, I'm out of touch,
I fell too fast, I feel too much,
I thought that you might have, some advise to give, on how to be, insensitive.

Oooohh Ryan!

haaaaaay. after all that toxicity, i finally followed all of your advices. CHILL! eh di mag-chill ako diba? hehehe. kahit wala pang matinong tulog, after duty i decided to watch a movie. THE PROPOSAL. gusto ko talagang panoorin tong movie because of ryan reynolds. nakakaaliw kasi sya eh. he can be funny, sweet, sarcastic, and dramatic all in the same time. :) kaya ayan, mejo umaliwalas yung mukha ko dahil napatawa nya ko kagabi. kahit na last full show nalang naabutan ko, still worth it parin! :)

actuall, napanood na namin sya sa store nung walang tao, kaya lang hindi masyado malinaw yung copy, kaya nanuod ulit ako sa BIG SCREEN! wehehehe. since sweldo naman kahapon, why not treat myself diba? pwede naman yun diba? :)

at to top it all of, i bought a new laptop bag. hehehehe. :) (at ngayon, wala na ulit akong pera. pooof!)